I think there is a lot of confusion out there about being single and not being single and that makes things really complicated.
Let us uncomplicated it and talk about it, shall we?
As you know, I waited quite a long time to post about the fact that I started dating again. At the same time, I kept talking about being single, which confused quite a few people. Whenever I talked about the fact that I am still single I got confused looks on people’s faces and some people sent me PM’s in response to Instagram posts pointing out that I am no longer single.
Before we get into anything, I would love you to listen to this podcast and then come back to this post. It encouraged me personally so much.
I believe I am still single until I am married and I think that takes a whole lot of pressure off a relationship and here is why.
Why I am still single
- Knowing that I was still single helped me transition from one season to the next. As you all know, dating again after such a long time was confusing to me so knowing that I am still single and can make my own decisions made things a lot easier.
- The fact that I am still single gives me more freedom and choice in this relationship. At the beginning, we were both still trying to figure out our relationship, our feelings and we were also getting to know each other in a new way. Making sure that we see each other as single individuals freed us up to figure it all out. I had the option to get out if I wanted to at any moment. In fact I still do. On top of that, I am not binding myself physically to him (a subject for another time).
- Knowing that I am still single made me enjoy the relationship that much more because I am able to enjoy every stage of the relationship. I think sometimes people move way too fast from being in a relationship, to being engaged to getting married and that in my personal opinion can complicate things and cause a lot of confusion. Dating in my 30s in the 21 century is hard on its own and I did not want to make it harder on me by moving too fast.
Now you know why I am still single. Ultimately, I want to encourage you again to not define yourself by your relationship status. You are so much more than that. I also want to encourage you if you start started dating again that it is ok to give yourself time and take one moment, one stage of the relationship after another.