Last week I wrote about How to be single in your 30s and although the same thoughts apply to How to be single in your 20s there are a few thoughts that I wanted to share specifically for those who are in their 20s and single.
Back in the day people would get out of their teenage years, get married at 21 and have kids at 24. But that’s not the case anymore and a lot us find ourselves single in our 20s. I was basically single all throughout my 20s. I mean there were crushes and almost romances and heartbreak, but nothing ever really worked out which is a subject for another time but it really helped me find out how to be single in your 20s.
The 20s should be an amazing age where we truly find out who we are, where we’re going and what our life is all about. And yes it is a time of trying out, of failing and succeeding and experiencing. I believe it should however not be a time where we just think about “me me me” and how can I get the best out of it but to look beyond ourselves and ask how can I serve the people around me, how can I make a difference, how can I leave a mark on this planet and in this life because we only have one .
The beauty of being single in your 20s truly is that we have independence, resources and unlimited potential. Those are three of the most amazing ingredients to make this world and yours included a better place.
So Instead of building our own empire we should build people, friendships and community.
Instead of trying to find “the One” we should find our passion and our calling. And just on a side note I don’t believing in trying all kinds of different relationships or sleeping around… Go after what you’re called to and God will put someone by your side to do it together with. At least that’s what I’m believing and what I have watched my friends do.
Instead of partying and trying #allthethings go and explore the world.
Let me rephrase that into a proper list for you to actually have something real practical.
How to be single in your 20s
1. Find your passion
The 20s are an amazing time to find out who you really are at the core and what you are actually passionate about. And yes that will also change over time, but find out what it is anyways. Because your passion will fuel your calling and your calling will always be connected to making a difference in this world. It is what I believe we’re made to be. When I was in my 20s I poured myself into my local church (actually I still do) and tried all kinds of different things where I could serve. I was on the youth team, the greeting team, the multimedia team, the translation team… I really tried all the things and maybe that wasn’t always the wisest thing to do but it really helped me to get to where I am now and no I don’t do all these things anymore. My answer was almost always “yes”. Nothing was “too much” and there was always room for more. And going through all these things, experiences, moments, memories it really helped me find out what I really love and am passionate about.
2. Build real and lasting friendships
There are two things I believe about friendships and that is a) we don’t have to have a ton of super close friends, maybe it is just a handful but we also should never come to the point where we say that b) I already have enough friends, I don’t need any more. I had to learn the hard way that friendships change. Your 20s are an amazing time to really invest into good friendships. Life-giving friendships. These kind of friends will go with your through the valleys and the mountain tops and they will be by your side as you’re making a difference in this world.
3. Go explore the world
The awesome thing about being single is that you have time and you’re independent. I suggest you go out and explore the world. Travel it. See its beauty. Be captivated, moved, astonished, amazed by God’s creation. And if you don’t have the resources to travel to exotic or remote places than please explore your world. What is behind your town. Take daytrips. Be a tourist in your own home. Because by seeing the world it will open your world and you will find out more about who you really are.
Well friends, that’s it on how to be single in your 20s. Today I really wanted to come on here and encourage you and challenge you to make the most of those years.
As always, much love
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